PRICE REDUCED!! 1985 Chevy Caprice Classic-Wildest Dreams, etc. - $2000 (Davenport, specifically)
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TL;DR: 1985 Chevy Caprice Classic. Runs quite well, no known mechanical issues, a couple of small rust spots. Asking 2000 obo. Refer to contact info at bottom of page. My best friend is selling this car because she has 2 new vehicles and money made from the sale will go to good causes; best friend Pokémon tattoos for her and I, and light up techno cowboy boots for her boyfriend. All reasonable offers considered.
Ask yourself one question. What has your life been missing? If you answered "A 1985 Chevy Caprice Classic (which I'm almost certain you did)," then here is the answer to your prayers. No, I'm not God (although I know a few people who would disagree). I'm just really good at guessing that you're looking to buy a couple tons of majestic metal resting upon radiant, rotating rubber. What's so fabulous about this particular transportation mechanism, you ask. Well, by golly, you're about to find out.
1985 birthed some pretty amazing things; "We Are the World," the beloved Tetris, Frankie Muniz, and AIDS. But perhaps most glorious of all was the 1985 Chevy Caprice Classic. Here are the specific stats for the vehicle that could be yours, if you play your cards right.
*Mileage - 115,000 or thereabouts
*Tires - 4
*Transmission - Automatic, but you can still choose what gear to put it in.
*Carburetor - New, chrome. I'm not sure what it's for, but it's very shiny. Quite frankly, that's good enough for me.
*Seats - Velour. I dare you to try and NOT pet the sh*t out of them.
*Backseat - Extremely spacious. Plenty of room to score with the opposite sex. Or the same sex even. I don't judge. Heck, maybe you just have a freakishly long-legged best friend.
*Trunk - Lots of room for junk. In the trunk.
I know, you can hardly believe your luck. Just when you think your day can't get any better, I have EVEN MORE to offer. The greatest thing about this vixen of a vehicle: IT RUNS!!! Quite well, as a matter of fact. There are no (known) mechanical issues. There are a couple of small rust spots, as to be expected from something that is 28 years old. To be honest, I've seen worse rust on the 28 year olds down at the Daisy Dooks, not even kidding.
Not only does this radical ride come with the ORIGINAL bill of sale, it also has a new stereo system for those of you hipsters that need to play your compact discs. BUT WAIT----
We will throw in a SURPRISE GRAB BAG for the lucky duck who takes home this beauty. Surprise grab bag, you say? Yes, of course. Because, honestly, what's more fun than a special little bag full of prizes and happiness? What will this Surprise Grab Bag consist of? If I tell you, it won't be a surprise. Hint: It will make your entire week worth living. Pinky promise.
Act now to receive all the offers mentioned above for just $2,000.00 (all reasonable offers considered) by calling or texting David at (563) 579-6029. Texts are the preferred method of contact, what with it being 2013 and all. If you're having trouble figuring out how to work a phone, just give up and go with e-mail. And don't reproduce. Oh, and if for some reason you feel the need to flag this, ask yourself this; "Isn't there something more productive I could be doing?" It's not that serious. Relax and grab a Snickers.
Location: Davenport, specifically
image 1image 2image 3image 4image 5image 6image 7
TL;DR: 1985 Chevy Caprice Classic. Runs quite well, no known mechanical issues, a couple of small rust spots. Asking 2000 obo. Refer to contact info at bottom of page. My best friend is selling this car because she has 2 new vehicles and money made from the sale will go to good causes; best friend Pokémon tattoos for her and I, and light up techno cowboy boots for her boyfriend. All reasonable offers considered.
Ask yourself one question. What has your life been missing? If you answered "A 1985 Chevy Caprice Classic (which I'm almost certain you did)," then here is the answer to your prayers. No, I'm not God (although I know a few people who would disagree). I'm just really good at guessing that you're looking to buy a couple tons of majestic metal resting upon radiant, rotating rubber. What's so fabulous about this particular transportation mechanism, you ask. Well, by golly, you're about to find out.
1985 birthed some pretty amazing things; "We Are the World," the beloved Tetris, Frankie Muniz, and AIDS. But perhaps most glorious of all was the 1985 Chevy Caprice Classic. Here are the specific stats for the vehicle that could be yours, if you play your cards right.
*Mileage - 115,000 or thereabouts
*Tires - 4
*Transmission - Automatic, but you can still choose what gear to put it in.
*Carburetor - New, chrome. I'm not sure what it's for, but it's very shiny. Quite frankly, that's good enough for me.
*Seats - Velour. I dare you to try and NOT pet the sh*t out of them.
*Backseat - Extremely spacious. Plenty of room to score with the opposite sex. Or the same sex even. I don't judge. Heck, maybe you just have a freakishly long-legged best friend.
*Trunk - Lots of room for junk. In the trunk.
I know, you can hardly believe your luck. Just when you think your day can't get any better, I have EVEN MORE to offer. The greatest thing about this vixen of a vehicle: IT RUNS!!! Quite well, as a matter of fact. There are no (known) mechanical issues. There are a couple of small rust spots, as to be expected from something that is 28 years old. To be honest, I've seen worse rust on the 28 year olds down at the Daisy Dooks, not even kidding.
Not only does this radical ride come with the ORIGINAL bill of sale, it also has a new stereo system for those of you hipsters that need to play your compact discs. BUT WAIT----
We will throw in a SURPRISE GRAB BAG for the lucky duck who takes home this beauty. Surprise grab bag, you say? Yes, of course. Because, honestly, what's more fun than a special little bag full of prizes and happiness? What will this Surprise Grab Bag consist of? If I tell you, it won't be a surprise. Hint: It will make your entire week worth living. Pinky promise.
Act now to receive all the offers mentioned above for just $2,000.00 (all reasonable offers considered) by calling or texting David at (563) 579-6029. Texts are the preferred method of contact, what with it being 2013 and all. If you're having trouble figuring out how to work a phone, just give up and go with e-mail. And don't reproduce. Oh, and if for some reason you feel the need to flag this, ask yourself this; "Isn't there something more productive I could be doing?" It's not that serious. Relax and grab a Snickers.
Location: Davenport, specifically
