These are a bit different that I remember!

[maximus84]

These are a bit different that I remember!
:lol:

Mary had a little pig,
She kept it fat and plastered;
And when the price of pork went up,
She shot the little turd.
********************

Mary had a little lamb.
Her father shot it dead.
Now it goes to school with her,
Between two hunks of bread.
********************

Jack and Jill went up the hill
To have a little fun.
Stupid Jill forgot the pill
And now they have a son.
********************

Simple Simon met a pie man going to the fair.
Said Simple Simon to the pie man,
'What have you got there?'
Said the pie man unto Simon,
'Pies, you dumb arse' !!
********************

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the kings' horses,
And all the kings' men.
Had scrambled eggs,
For breakfast again.
********************

Hey diddle, diddle, the cat took a piddle,
All over the bedside clock.
The little dog laughed to see such fun.
Then died of electric shock.
********************

Georgie Porgy pudding and pie,
Kissed the girls and made them cry.
And when the boys came out to play,
He kissed them too 'cause he was g_y.
********************

There was a little girl who had a little curl
Right in the middle of her forehead.
When she was good, she was very, very good.
But when she was bad........
She got a fur coat, jewels, a waterfront condo, and a sports car.
******************************************************

 

[xitabl442]

According to the Diceman, Andrew Dice Clay:

Jack and Jill went up the hill
Each with a buck and a quarter
Jill came down with two-fifty
Ohh, what a sl*t!

The rest of his rhymes would get me kicked off of here.

 

[maximus84]

The rest of his rhymes would get me kicked off of here.

Which part? 'sl*t'?

 

[megaladon6]

"little boy blue....he needed the money!!!"

there once was a man from nantucket...

 

[1evilregal]

my Dice favorite of all time:

"3 blind mice, see them run,
where the f*** do they think they're goin'? " :lol: