the funniest story!!!

[dogsht]

Bowiemonte, Thats funny right there I don't care who ya are. Looks pretty similar to my signature. lol.

I was thinking down a different line. One time after first putting my built Caddy motor in my 88 Cutty I had it out for a spin. It looked a bit ghetto at the time with Cutlass wheels up front and GN wheels on the rear. I went past a local Dodge dealership where the day before I looked at a brand new $50,000+ sticker SRT pickup truck with the 505ci V10 Viper motor in it. I think it was like 500HP & 525TQ. The guy waited on me to go past and pulled out and followed. I thought thank gawd I have slicks on. I remembered thinking the day before that with all that torque no weight on the rear and them low profile 22s that it would have to be spin city.

He followed me for blocks before he finally pulled up besides me at a light. I wondered if the slicks & GN wheels made him hesitate. By the time we got across the intersection his front bumper was even with my rear bumper and we stayed right there until 60 mph (in a 35) when he jumped on the brakes and turned off. It was a rush and I was like damn I would have liked to have pulled over and BSed with him. Then I thought if I had just paid $50G for a new bad arse Viper pickup and then lost to the first ghetto Cutlass I might be on my way back to the dealership. LOL

 

[bkbuick]

I remember getting an oil change at a quick lube place. The guy starts my Regal and looks at me with a confused face. Like hmm what a weird sound. Then he puts his hands on the radiator like he's performing an exorcism. Says this car is running rough. You should get the fuel injection cleaning. I'm like really, you think so? How much is it? Oh my only 150.00. Okay can you show me where are the injectors. Would they be under the carburetor? He just lifted the gate so I can leave.

 

[1evilregal]

I think, 90% of diagnosing a car in NC is translation.

I can relate!

I get those questions all the time... "my car won't crank- does it spin over when you turn the key?- yes, do you think I need a starter? maybe the alternator? - "

get customers all the time wanting a "cadillac converter"
you guys that have been in the military might appreciate sending smone for a box of "ground guides"

 

[Kwik_Cutty88]

I think, 90% of diagnosing a car in NC is translation.

I can relate!

I get those questions all the time... "my car won't crank- does it spin over when you turn the key?- yes, do you think I need a starter? maybe the alternator? - "

get customers all the time wanting a "cadillac converter"
you guys that have been in the military might appreciate sending smone for a box of "ground guides"

Haha. It's also pretty funny watching my dad taking the skid plate of a truck and it weighs 50 LBS more than it should, all because of caked on mud. And then you get Silverados and Sierras with the "Carolina Squat" going on. Front end up 1 foot higher than the rear, headlights aiming at the sky, and baaaad steering. They come in complaining that the front tires wear like crap, try to do an alignment? Nope, suspension is unloaded adjustments can't be done!

 

[tc1959]

"I think I needs some of Dat freezon In my Air Conditioner" Happens around here every summer.

 

[1984-monte-carlo-ss]

"can you set the choke on my fuel injectors"

 

[Phoenyx]

This ones kinda funny and sad at the same time (non gbody):

Back in about 1997 a friend of mine had a sister that just bought a 1994 Sunbird. For what it was, it was a nice car. Red rag top with black top and black leather interior, FULLY loaded with a V6 auto. The car looked like new. After about 4-5 months she had to get it towed because it wouldn't start. So her dad and brother start trying to figure it out. Came to the conclusion that it was run out of oil and seized. So here's the best part (I was there for this lol): her dad asked her if the oil light was on. And she says, "Yeah, but I was waiting for a buzzer or something to go off." The insurance was taken off and it was parked on their driveway until she could afford a new engine. But sadly a failed street race between 2 drunk drivers caused the car to be written off. And insurance didn't cover it so the car was a total loss. But really... a buzzer? lol

 

[bill]

But really... a buzzer? lol

They didnt call em Idiot Lights for nothing....

 

[DRIVEN]

I remember getting an oil change at a quick lube place. The guy starts my Regal and looks at me with a confused face. Like hmm what a weird sound. Then he puts his hands on the radiator like he's performing an exorcism. Says this car is running rough. You should get the fuel injection cleaning. I'm like really, you think so? How much is it? Oh my only 150.00. Okay can you show me where are the injectors. Would they be under the carburetor? He just lifted the gate so I can leave.

:lol: I've been on the opposite side of that one: About 15 years ago a customer brought in his teenaged son's Volare. I don't even remember why it originally came in but by the time I got done checking it out I had a HUGE list of needed repairs -- complete sh*t box. My boss suggested to the customer that he let us do a VCR (vehicle condition report) to get an idea of what else the car really needed so he could decide if it was worth the initial repair cost. It paid an hour. Might as well get paid, right? I turned in the inspection and 5 minutes later My boss comes out to my bay with the smug looking customer right behind him and says that the customer wanted to ask me a question.
"How come you checked the 'good' box next to horn function?"
"Because it works", I replied.
"That's funny because it's sitting on my kitchen table right where my son left it last week after he pulled it off so I know it doesn't work. You charge me $80 just make up phoney inspection results and try to sell me all this other work I don't even need and totally miss a basic safety item like the horn? I'm not sure I even want you to work on my car.
"Uh, yeah, he only removed ONE horn. I plugged the other one in for you. No charge." as I leaned in and beeped it at him.
He asked a couple other questions to try to trip me up but couldn't. Like I said earlier -- complete sh*t box. He bought no repairs. Not even a thank you. Go figure.


I have to also concur with the translation issues with things like:
"turn over"
"crank"
"pull"
"cuts out"
"when the fuel injection kicks in"
I've actually been handed repair orders that simply stated "something's not right".

 

[dlo253]

manual transmission fluid :shock:

Meh, not these days. So many companies sell actual 'manual transmission fluid'........ but it is funny that people pay for it when they are buying the label Haha.