Did you feel a hand on each shoulder? I can guarantee his finger wasn't THAT long.
Joke of the day
- Thread starter jlcustomz
- Start date
I actually joked for years that I was going to find a doctor with dainty fingers and good depth perception when it came time for this.... Imagine my surprise when my normal doctor referred me to the 30ish female doc specialist. was kinda hoping that I did put my pants over by hers! 😆
I saw a 3 legged dog today looking for the guy who shot his pa
A pony went to the doctor complaining about having a sore throat. The doctor said, it's ok, you’re just a little horse..
A pony went to the doctor complaining about having a sore throat. The doctor said, it's ok, you’re just a little horse..
A man was sitting at a bar enjoying an after-work cocktail with his friends when an exceptionally beautifull, extremely sexy young woman entered. She was so striking that the man could not take his eyes away from her. The young woman noticed his overly attentive stare & walked directly toward him.
Before he could offer her apologies for being so rude for staring, the young woman said to him, 'I'll do anything, absolutely anything, that you want me to do, no matter how kinky, for $100, on one condition.'
Flabbergasted, the man asked what the condition was.
The young woman replied, 'You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words.'
The man considered his proposition for a moment and slowly counted out five $20 bills, which he pressed into the young woman's hand along with his address. He looked deeply into her eyes & slowly, meaningfully said, "Clean my house."
Before he could offer her apologies for being so rude for staring, the young woman said to him, 'I'll do anything, absolutely anything, that you want me to do, no matter how kinky, for $100, on one condition.'
Flabbergasted, the man asked what the condition was.
The young woman replied, 'You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words.'
The man considered his proposition for a moment and slowly counted out five $20 bills, which he pressed into the young woman's hand along with his address. He looked deeply into her eyes & slowly, meaningfully said, "Clean my house."
A man and his wife were vacationing in Spain, they went to the same restaurant each day and the special everyday soup with the testicles of the bull that lost the bull fight the night before. The man and his wife begged the owner of the restaurant to serve them the special to them before they had to return home on the weekend. The owner told them to return on Friday and they could have the special. Friday came and the husbnad and wife eagerly went to the restaurant for lunch. When they sat down the chef came out with the specail and put the bowl on the husband and wife's table. The husband was shocked at the little balls in the soup and asked why they were so small. The owner of the restaurant explained to the that the bull won had on the previous night.
An atom walks into a bar and asks the bartender
for a double. The bartender says, "why what's wrong?"
the atom says, "I lost a neutron today." The bartender
says, "are you sure?" and the atom says, "I'm positive."
for a double. The bartender says, "why what's wrong?"
the atom says, "I lost a neutron today." The bartender
says, "are you sure?" and the atom says, "I'm positive."
A photon walks up to the desk at a hotel. After he checks in, the person behind the counter asks if he needs help with his bags. He replied "No, thanks, I'm traveling light"
as penance go back and read all of these in Rodney Dangerfield's voice.
I get no respect, I tell ya! Just last week, I met the surgeon general. He offered me a cigarette.